Growing up blows

Growing up blows. I make $400 a month and I pay $100 for insurance and $120 for gas. Plus I pay for what I eat and wear as well. So, now I am in debt 1,500 and plus I have to pay for a new car and the insurance and gas on that car. So I have to get a second job. Having to make the decision to get a second job sucked because it is summer and I just got a boyfriend and I am ready to party like a college kid and party like I feel I deserve to do. Growing up and making these shitty decisions has helped me realize that I deserve happiness. My boyfriend makes me happy and even though I am terrified of him going back to his ex of 2 years I am going to try and make this work. No hiding, no being shady with other guys, total communication and everything because I like him and I am not going back to being indecisive and being stupid. For the first time in my life I feel like I am growing up. The only bad thing about this is that I have never felt further from my dreams than I do right now.